“life will be better in spring”

June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 March 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 September 2011 January 2012 February 2012 April 2013 May 2013

"When Jesus died as an innocent victim.. the most sweeping historical revolution in the world, namely, the emergence of an empathy for victims" -Philip Yancey

I started off really strongly, completed my first 10 km in 55 mins, which I was very happy about it because it was under 1 hr! Continued running happily, looking at the planes, checking out the pretty girls, the handsome guys, the fat, the thin, the old, the young, the really young ones, the volunteers, the cars with the people in it cheering us, the moon..etc.. it was pretty fascinating with the types of people who joins marathon. But at the same time my stomach felt really weird because of the things I took before the run. I ate 2 bananas & noodle slightly before 2 hrs of the run, and power gel, 100 plus and water during the run. It was a weird mixture that made my stomach feel weird.

At the 16.5km mark, my left leg cramped up. At the 17.5 mark, my right leg almost cramped up. Couldn't really run after that. My knees and left ankle was hurting badly. So I was mainly walking and trying to jog for the last 3-4km. It was so bad that at 18km mark I asked myself 'why am I doing this?!', didn't really have an answer. I continued pushing on. I was really pissed off at that time because I was looking for SALONPAS spray from the volunteers, but none of them had it! Shouldn't that the organizers foresee that people's legs were gonna cramp up? I believe could have done it by 2hr15 if they had provided the spray.

At 19.5 km, I was limping, dragging my right leg along, was adamant to finish it within 2hr15 no matter what. I saw the 2:15 mins pacer guy run pass along side me, clapping his hand saying "2hr15 mins, follow me!!! Lets go!" I was damn pumped up but I only lasted for 100m before I started walking again. hahah. Quite a sad sight, watching your 'goal' run away.

Managed to finish it in 2hr32 I think? Unofficially. Totally forgot to stop my stopwatch. It was disappointing, but it was sure darn satisfying after completing my first 21 km marathon. I really need more training and clock more distance to prevent further cramp ups for my future marathons. Next up, AHM 21km, aiming for 2hrs10mins. Nextnext up, Standard Charted 42km! I will try for 4hrs 30mins.

Give it time and it really does review certain truth that you and I may be searching for. The sort of truth that feels like a revelation. Though the time taken is often not as enjoyable as it might be, but it's a building and learning process that is essential.

I have figured out some answers that I have been searching for, and it took me a long time. Long long time. Something that was so evident yet it never did occur to me earlier. I feel so naive for always blaming myself.
All I am going to say here is that things change and people come and go and it wasn't your fault because you remained as awesome as you are.

True fact of life.

I have took back one thing today during worship ex, Worship unlocks your destiny.

"If someone wants to be part of your life, they’ll be there. So don’t bother saving a spot for someone who wont make an effort to stay."-TEEN THINGS.



I have struggled so much that it has turned me into someone that I don't want to be. With all the struggles that I am going through now, I am still very blessed, but I have neglected to pray for those who really needs it. Gotta pray more, it's powerful.

"Even now I have one who speaks for me in heaven; the one who is on my side is high above. The one who speaks for me is my friend. My eyes pour out tears to God." Job 16:19,20 If Job can do it, so can I : )

It has been awhile since the whole group has been together. Yah. Fun it was, though it was short.

Hate it when I force changes upon myself. Hate it when I bring it all upon myself. Why can't I just stay in this place for awhile more.sigh.





When I'm too nice, I become a tool. When I'm just a tad less nice, people start to hate me. What is the world coming to!? haha.



love this song ttm.